~My Universe~

Introspective Bus Rides...

2006-10-26T11:54:00.000+07:00

I was riding a sparsely filled bus along the usual mellow street on a peaceful late morning, back home from camp. The aircon was soothing with pleasing tunes from my FM receiver. Arr... I really like a relaxing bus ride in nediocre weather; not too sunny or gloomy, with music in my ears. I like indulging in a reflective sate of mind where I contemplate about my personal views, intentions, actions, ambitions, goals, feelings, opinions, mindset, character, attitude, things done or not done, future, past etc. Basically, about my life and everything else that is linked to it, like you.

Personally, its very entralling for me. I like getting in touch with myself, just like get together with a very close friend, Jack, whose number is right in your handphone but you don't call him very often, and during one very ordinary morning, you met him on a bus and catch up with each other unpretentiously. After you alighted from the bus, you never know when is your next meeting with Jack but you know sincerely that he knows you best and will always be around to serve as your becon if ever you are trapped in a aphotic storm. This is one friend you can never lose because he is you, your true self.

I am very fortunate indeed that mine is virtuous with credit from my religious teaching. Definitely he is not perfect, less me but I know that for the rest of my life, I am concrete sure that I will not be swayed too greatly from my own belief. Yes, I have some glaring habits that I still can't kick but I am no less aware about it, just that old habit dies hard. For example now that ORD is just round the corner, there is an urge to take things which I assume that belongs to nobody's and will be discarded anyway. I mean its common for some to be itchy handed to take seemingly insignificant things (shower foams, packet milk left in the fridge, towels, lost watch unclaimed). There are many obviously unclaimed items littered around and I think its fine to take them, but come to think of it, I can't be 100% sure and a moral controversy definitely presents, or does it?

Hmm... Now ask yourself what would you do? Would you think since that old digital watch had been left inside the drawer of an shared office table for like the past 6 months and nobody gives it a second look at all, its alright to take it anyway? Would you consider that as long as that watch doesn't belongs to you, you won't feel comfortable at all at the thought of claiming it? In my opinion, for those who will simply just take it anyway and to those whose strictly will never take it, logically both of your actions are acceptable. In both scenerio, although its a very small incident, there isn't any second thought to what actions will be taken. When there isn't any concern raised in the mind, what does this means? It means that you never improve, never learn.

If such minor situation is able to raise an issue for you to think through, I am glad that you have a self-conscious Jack and he is always aware of your actions and thoughts. When the your self reflecting mechanism is activated, its no longer important (because its no going to have an impact on others) whether you take that watch or leave it because you worked your brain and this introspective attitude affects the rest of your life. Siao! You may think why make life so difficult for yourself? Take means take, don’t take means don’t take what. Think so much for what? You got a lot of time and have nothing better to do right? So you think, I will say.

Have you not complaint countless times that your boyfriend is always insensitive and that your girlfriend always seems to fed up of you over nothing? Why? Simple, when you are in a relationship your every word, action, behaviour, attitude and intention affects your lover significantly. So do you really think that its really ok to her if she always remind you not to dig your nose in public but you don’t really care much because its like such a small thing. Who will remember me and complain for the next 3 days that she saw a guy digging nose in the lift anyway? Or you think that since there seems to exist an unwritten law that somehow gives a girl excuse to be late and end up making her guy friend wait, you cultivated a habit of being late. Furthermore he never complain to me before, only gave me a cute disapproving stare, and still treat me like a princess, so my late coming is never a concern to our relationship, or is it?

1 year down the road, your girlfriend got fed up you are insensitve to her and always do foolish things, your boyfriend says, “Sorry but I have tolerated long enough. I told you numerous times and you just take it that I can accept all your flaws.” She told her before, he told her before, but they never see that small things like this can cause such a grief in their lover. No happily ever after. So don’t just complain about her, and stop nagging at him about the same thing everytime. As tough as it may seem, its not that tedious to slowly take more and more time to observe an introspective view, and you will find your life improving. Do it for yourself, do it for your love. Trust me.

As much as I try to keep my promises, I keep breaking them.
As much as I try to make good use of my time, I keep wasting it.
As much as I try to be a better man, I keep making mistakes.
As much as I try to have courage, I keep withdrawing myself.
As much as I try to be perfect, I can't cause I am only a human.
But one thing I am sure of... For you, I love.

CISCO

2006-10-24T22:34:00.000+07:00

I apologise to all my 忠实听众。 Didn't blogged for a month le, was inspired by 阿圆 who went MIA from MSN for like 3 weeks. Sometimes I really think through things a lot, and very detailed. Past one month keep thinking about how to siam outfield and quickly clear FFI n clearence, book xxx appointment today, change yyy appointment the next, until blogging disapeared from my mind. 好啦，也怪我有空时懒惰吧。

I am so glad that CISCO came and recruited ppl as security officer. Everything was free (meals, course fee, uniform etc), and on top of that got transport allowance! The instructor also damn 搞笑，look and act a bit like 梁志强, always crack very entertaining jokes and do scenerio role play until super dupper funny. Everytime he act until damn zai 时, we will hum the 红星大奖 music. Haha.

The best part, when we pass out this coming thursday and friday from the course, we already have an assignment waiting on friday itself, as young dashing and promising security officer for S.H.E 签唱会 at IMM. I was thinking can do an entry titled, "和S.H.E.的零距离接触!". But later we got update that only those taking test on thursday and pass it can go, and those (me included) taking on friday, sorry to you! 血地狱！Got me all excited for a few days and now suddenly 泼冷水. ARGH! 嘿。。。 Anyway I not a hardcore S.H.E fan la so I managed to swollow my disappointment. But still... S.H.E! 我们永远支持你！

Ma Lai Xi Ya

2006-09-16T16:33:00.000+07:00

Oldest and the best first. I like this photo. My first photo of ah ma who I love so much. :)

Aunt caught eating durian.

This is the cute liang yun. Have lots of fun and frustration trying to take photos of her, even though she covered her face initially.

I adore her didi too. Hair so tough, his tougher than mine!

I tried so many times to make him smile for a shot in front of the mirror. Some of my fruits of success!

My elder cousin, shu jing jie jie. Notice me at the far back ground.

She is a die hard fan of the ride, Wei Lun.

Another cousin. 3 years younger than me, although it looks more like the other way round. Oops!

I slept beside my cousin during the visit and had a really, nice chat with her before zzzing. Talked about our love life and catch up with each other.
I know its bad to snap at ppl sleeping but I couldn't help it. Haha. I browsed through the photos she took on her visit to Langkawi Island with her china bf. I must tell you how fantastic it will be to go there for a break!

She's only 5 with a teenager's hairstyle.

its been ages since I blog man. Anyway I went to malaysia for a small relative gathering, reunioned with my cute cousins. Some how feel that I can communicate with my cousins near my age one better nowadays although we are "liang di xiang ge". Those in singapore one still in primary sch. Haha. I bought a leather belt and some goodies like mooncake and "dao sa pia" for my friends back here. I tried so hard to take the pics of the kids, and realise that its really time to get a phone with better cam abilities. Maybe someone give one to me as xmas gift? :p

爱ing it.

2006-08-25T19:45:00.000+07:00

这个星期过得真不错。刚刚看完了日剧“白色巨塔”觉得非常的感动也让我学到了不少。一定在猜想伟伦是不是有毛病，用华语来blog。其实是因为刚安装了中文字星所以想换换口味，练习华语一下。哈哈。昨天和前天都有在组屋区里走走活动，觉得很庆幸有一群hougang friends可以有空时就三两个约出来谈谈话、说说笑，一起去吃晚餐、去买日常用品等。拜三和阿圆阿辉（Lol, like some corny 70's singer name, 阿圆and阿辉)去吃然后去hougang point买groceries还有找看有没有「白色巨塔」的下集，可惜没有。一起买买东西也可以是那么一件乐事。

昨天在家里吃了个水果餐后，一个人到hougang mall去走走，顺便看有没有「白色巨塔」。刚巧最近有读到stephen hawking的报导所以想去图书棺借和他有关的书籍。结果一借就借了四本于物理有关的书。然后到处逛逛，寻找一些送礼的点子。在凉爽的夜里漫步真的感觉很棒，很轻松，是一个很好的减压管道。

今天一整天就坐在电脑前打字，把看完「白色巨塔」的感想写下，交给我一位佛学老师投稿，和那些大人们分享。我也登在这里吧。读不读是你的选折。

没有坏人的戏

在刚刚过去的周末。我把一部叫做 ”白色巨塔” 的日剧看完。非常地令我感动也学习到了不少。非常感谢唐老师和母亲，因为要不是老师把这部自己买了却还没看就先借出去的连续据借给我母亲，就没有这个因缘接触到深受好评的“白色巨塔”。在妈妈的鼓励下，晚辈在此分享一些小心得希望前辈们能够多多包含。

戏一开场就能看到财前医生非常认真集中的在复习切除食道癌的手术。财前外科技术高明，是医大第一外科揭出的外科医生，被大家认定为第一外科现任教授，东教授，的接班人. 可惜财前野心极大，为了名利也因此丧失了当医生的本质和责任，所以东教授非常不愿意把棒子传给他。

相反的，和财前同辈的里见医生一心投入于医学研究和照顾病患身上。第一内科的里见医生对待患者非常认真及无私，所以在名挣暗斗的医大里罕见的医生,可说是出污泥而不染。因为立场和想法不一，所以两人之间经常有意见上的磨擦但他们还是好朋友，非敌非友。

我还记得两年前仍然在佛院教补习时，有一天下课后，唐老师和我们这些补习老师一起喝午茶时分享了一个用来比喻社会上三种人。他把专业技术非凡的人称为“工具”，把对人类心灵教育及引导费上特别努力和精神的人称为“人”。这两组人占为少数，因为他们都是社会的精英对人类音响很大。剩下的人都被列为很好的“工具”和很好的“人”之间。“白色巨塔”里头的前财和里见毅然地想起这个简单的描述。

这部日剧给于我很多对人身及生命的感受。有一幕是里见很同情一明末期病患，答应陪伴他到最后。大河内教授对他说了一段很有意义的话“世上没有绝对的事，医生也不能为此而烦恼不已，我赞成你的想法”这句话内涵不浅，提醒了我不管是好事、坏事、伟大或者是其他一切的事物都是有无常性的，所以不可以让自己的情绪和想法扰乱了自己，要有觉，即使是面对着善的动机念头时也不可马虎。因为人们往往以为做的事情是善行益行，就很容易忽略了其中可能带来的不宜。很多时候缺乏智慧的关心和善举会产生很大的反效果，这里我想提到父母子女关系的一个小见解。我身为刚过二十的孩子觉得，父母都很耽心孩子变坏不孝顺父母，在他们少年期尤其是这样。我觉得如果孩子慢慢变坏，与其和他硬碰硬不如让他去，千万别断了沟通的桥梁。因为这个桥梁是父母认识孩子最需要的管道。唐老师说过学佛“可乱不可断”，相对的教导孩子时要铭记“可坏不可断”。桥梁断了，再好的孩子也会和父母陌生的。

戏里的财前医生一直都是以狭小的心量看事情，不明白为什么里见医生可以为了真相、正义、医德过人生，一点野心都没有。一个很好的“工具”虽然在社会很有成就，可是却会对很棒的“人”产生疑问，不了解他们怎样满足于简单的物质生活，跟加不明白做“人”的深渊意义，只是会对他们产生好奇而已。“人”却永远看得清楚“工具”的本质和内心世界，不会羡慕在苦海中不停打滚的“工具”，反而会同情他们。因为“工具”不真正了悟做人的意义，一直到年老退休后，死神逼近时，因为内心没有一个可好好依赖的归宿，才会对“人”起着认真的态度，要了解人活着真正的含义。

这里不是在拿“工具”跟“人”比较高低，因为社会上一定要有很好的“工具”和“人”才对，一不可缺，也一定要有夹在中间，不是优秀“工具”但也不是完全“人”的大多数人。这样才对，才平衡。就像是佛陀教导我们一定要学中道，偏善偏恶、偏自我立场或是偏他人立场，就不容易以平等公平的方式待人处事。智慧最重要，因为它是真善真上的源动力。没了智慧就像是没戴眼镜，有眼睛却看不清楚。希望你我都好好珍惜佛陀定做给我们的这幅眼镜。

我不懂很多，也有很多看得到却很难修正的习性，有时会生起和“心魔”强烈的挣扎，觉得很差劲，很辛苦。有些人说学了佛越学越辛苦，因为自己的短处渐渐地看得越来越明显，没学之前反而少了些烦恼。恭喜你，因为你的自觉能力加强了，智慧花开了。你进步了！

在此感恩我的父母，尤其是爸爸。谢谢他当初反对妈妈学佛，要不是爸爸的缘故，今天就不会感受家里的进步，所以现在才有个温馨美满的快乐窝。感恩三宝。虽然唐老师说过“不要感谢我，感谢三宝就够了”，但僻径还是有师恩，所以也要对老师说声谢谢你。

妹妹写过一句话：“天上有云，地上有草，这世界是美丽的！”。我想加上一段：“天上有云，地上有草，人间有爱，这世界是美丽的！”

陈伟伦

老师请您帮我看看如何，帮忙加以修改和给于一些意见后，登在「白云光彩」吧。可以电邮 weiwei171@hotmail.com给我。多谢了！

Back Home.

2006-08-22T16:46:00.000+07:00

Back home finally! Home always feels so warm esp after being stuck in camp for a freaking week! Watched a jap series drama hit "White Tower" about doctors. Very touching and meaningful drama. I never thought that the small coy square we have can host a steamboat dinner! I was very surprised but I applaude to those who came up with this ingenious idea. We also had a 5kg black forest cake (chosen and ordered by me) to celebrate the opening of Scorpion Den and OC's 29th bday. Played 4 rounds of mahjong and swooped $50+. The most enjoyable thing is the table soccer from the officer mass. I proclaim to be the best defender (haha) and had tons of fun smashing the ball around, although I my poor back suffer some aches after the games but its worth the pain. Dun have much photos here to share but heck it la. Here's an entry to fill up the missing parts. :)

wei liang's laptop, my best companion while I am COS.

160806 Tuesday 1147h, coy just got activated. Doing COS.

I received the imminent call for activation and sounded off the siren, sending off a wave of adrenaline rush like a chain reaction. Everyone except me and Andrew who is doing sentry are getting busy, that's why I can write up a blog entry at such a rush hour. Haha. I am actually involved but due to my back injury, I am out of the main force and doing COS now. I am like the main coordinating brain now, picking up calls, typing down any information or reminders, like a data bank.

Well, have to be confined to camp for another more 6 days. There are so many things I want to do man. But luckily I can use my Creative Zen Nano as a thumb drive to store text files, and I also wrote some personal letters (in Chinese). Its much better to pen down how you feel than to keep them inside and let those thoughts keep on whirling inside your mind. I must agree that my bloody Chinese still sucks but the more I write, the more fluid I get and managed to recall many characters that I would've otherwise forgotten. Maybe because I wrote them in a serious mood with lots of mixed emotion. Like I have said like a thousand times, don’t judge any thing too early through our mere human’s mind. A supposedly unfortunate event can yield something pleasant while similarly, what you expect to work out correctly can turn out to be a disaster. Although recalled unexpectedly for guard, I made used of the eerily quiet wee hours to write. It took me 1.5h there and another 4h to finish that freaking Chinese letter! I had always been a slightly slower in my writing speed and have simply not written anything Chinese for years. Thus I decided I should practice my writing more man. Yesterday was another night; I spent 1.5 hours last night from 1.30am to 3am to write, getting a little tired now. I could feel a heavy rock being heaved out from inside after all those writing. It’s wonderful.

I had wanted to blog before I book in during Sunday but guess what, I enjoyed the past 1 week so immensely that I actually forgotten totally that I have guard duty on Sunday. For those in NS will understand the pain of being wake up in the morning first thing by a call to recall you back for weekend guard duty totally unprepared. Sian… I didn’t bring in things to keep me occupy. At least I have more time for myself, to explore my own self. Sound so chim n profound. Haha. I predict I will flood my blog, so get into your float and be swept by the flood of entries! Woo!

I figured I must put some photos here. Now this photo is one desperate attempt. haha.

Most hardworking clerk, anuj "ba tiao". :p

On the contrary, the lasziest clerk, zhen jie.

Week of Many Happenings!

2006-08-17T11:23:00.000+07:00

So long never blog le. Curse the army. I am doing this in a rush cos I a out of camp to collect my X-ray la so might be a little rush. I will beautify it next week. Luckily guan posted some photos that I can use so I just copy and paste from there. haha. Below is what i wrote during my free time in camp.

160806 Tuesday 1358h, still at coy office.

Last week held so much fond memories with so many things happened and learned. It’s a pity I could only write about them now. I had lunch with Guan on Sunday, watched fireworks alone on Tuesday, intended to watch fireworks on Friday with a bunch of people but ended up going to Far East with Guan for a night interview, planned to go catch the last firework show on Saturday and I ended up sitting at Olio eating a late dinner at Suntec.

Friday I was sloughing in front of my computer when my LG T5100 rang.
Guan: “Ai, where are you?”
Me: “ At home lor. You?”
Guan: “At bugis. Why never call me? I thought you will be calling me?”
Me: “I am waiting for you to call also ma.”
Guan: “Wah. Faster come leh. Very sian.”
Me: “Ok ok. Bye bye.”

With that, I immediately went to clean up and changed up before going down to bugis, only to find a desperately hungry girl. We went to the over priced and cannot-make-it Parco bugis food court. She ordered xiao wan mian and gobbled it all down clean. I didn’t believe she could finish the whole thing, which goes to show how hungry she was. Horrible. Haha. ;p Worst, Guan was so filled she doesn’t wanna move after the meal and insisted to sit there. We ended up sitting there for more than an hour and even took photos, not knowing all along there were people eyeing our table. I had thought that little girl wanted to take photos too and teased her to take photos. The same old mischievous me. When we finally left, we couldn’t figure out why the little girl and her mum bothered waiting for our place. Whatever la.

Taken with ah guan at the food court.

Went to a nearby dessert shop to eat “gui ling gao” later. (Eat and eat… Getting fat liao man.) Maybe Guan never eat enough yet ba, and dropped the honey pot lid onto my “gui ling gao”. We couldn’t stop laughing but the good thing is my bowl is not flooded with honey. Nice dessert! Supposed to go watch fireworks one until her friend called and physcoed her to go for the lucrative job’s interview. Knowing that she also didn’t wan to miss watching it, I tried phycoing her but to no avail.

The famous "gui ling gao". Dun ask ah guan to pour the honey for you! :p

Reaching Orchard rather early, we dropped by The Marriott just beside Far East to take a look and to take a breather from the street crowd. We acted as if we are a customer and sneak up to a level above the lobby. There we found a nice spot with sofas to chill out and rest our feet. We took some very interesting snapshots and had a great time posing and laughing. Sweet. J The fed up thing is that the interview turn up to be more of a meet-the-ti-ko-pe session to choose his top 3 KTV hostesses than anything close to a decent interview. No choice la, its hard to avoid that sometimes pretty girls will run into such a situation la, so I didn’t blame Guan n Daphne la. Lol. While waiting for Daph, we saw this uncle wearing a baby blue shirt who is a Smurf look alike. Haha. Snapped a photo of him.

Yao dao office boy. Act until quite pro right?

Marriott's lobby below.

ah guan say my post very gay but with the risk of getting seen by the staff i can't be blame also la.

While she stress to me how nice her legs are in this photo. I can't deny it la...

and the best photo i've taken this year. I lost my head in orchard so I replace it with ah guan's instead. haha. we had so much fun laughing at this shots until my mouth nearly cramped.

that's Mr Smurf.

ah guan+daphne=2 pretty girls!

I just think ah guan look very funny here. very laughable. Lol.
Yishen pick the 3 of us up at Hougang MRT and sent the girls to punggol park’s Bliss restaurant, while I went over hui’s place for mahjiong session. Well, rong yao won 4D again; about $2k, and he had steamboat at home at about 12 midnight, a very weird time for steamboat. Still, it was nice and I ate a bit before proceeding to the mahjiong table. Hui was the sole winner in the first 2 “feng”, rounding in at least $30 already. In the end, it was xiang who lost the most, about $30, while I lost about $15. Hui and yishen took our winnings respectively but as usual, we didn’t involve any real cash, just playing for the enjoyment. J

Next day made another effort to catch the last firework display with belle hui n rui xiang. As usual this bunch of friends is preachers of procrastination, and at Olio we ate and spent the night chatting. The food was nothing short of tremendous (mimicking my sec sch vice principal, Miss Ivy Ng.), belle’s spaghetti changed my disapproving view of cream sauce and both the strawberry and oreo cheesecake was like, Aarrr…. Damn delicious! Xiang’s durian ice cream pancake, make’s me drool man. We shared some personal experiences there and our view and touched on some sensitive issues that made us, esp belle and me red in the face. Haha. And ronghui with his signature “fork-thru-the-cake” action. Lol.

After that we made our way home slowly by train home due to the vast number of firework desperados. Guan supposed to join us for mahjiong but she was too tired. Too late, we already reached her place to pick her up so she invited me and hui up to her room to relaxed and chat. We viewed some hilarious vidx form YouTude, photos and helped Guan cleared sweets. Poor hui suffered sore throat on our way back home. Sensing hui was rather low on mood due to some relationship issue, we settled for a drink at 7 eleven and stood at a cross road junction to talk, look a bit weird to stand there so long la, but whatever la. When home slept and got activated for guard next morning.

Great week except that it ended with me doing guard.

Now I gotta rush to complete my agenda liao. Till next week to be free again!

Let's Put an End to This

2006-08-10T09:30:00.000+07:00

The long awaited National Day has finally came and gone yesterday. Phew! After going through all the bloody rehearsals for like 4 months, the scene of a fully packed stadium is no longer an unfamiliar sight. The sea of red and white audiences, the same voice giving commands, the booming F-16's, Apache, the "Fudijua" (firing of the volley of joy) and many more. But the mood is definitely diff la. Everyone's morale is exceptionally high and the thought of appearing on national TV really intrigues me.

If you read my last post, you will know I suffered back injury. I went for X ray 3 days ago after some persuasion by mum and came home with some painkillers, and they r the ones that helped me through the parade. Initially I thought of not marching and let someone else have my slot, but as the actual parade looms closer, I decided that this is one of the thing I will regret if I don't do it and I insisted on marching. :)

NDP is like a once in a life time thing to get involved and although we burnt many weekends with many complaints, but I know all the mother's sons down there yesterday have no regrets.

For Honour and Glory! Commando!

Finally... Airborne!

2006-08-05T13:43:00.000+07:00

Finally! After going to the airbases for jumps like the 10th time in a row without jumping, I finally did yesterday! Yeah! Everyone including Shuang Wai, Loke, Guo Yong and many others were so glad and excited about it. Looking back, the last time anyone of us that day did our first jump like a year ago and did our 2nd after such a long time!

Being the heaviest in my sorty of 8 people jumping, I was appointed the first jumper, meaning I will stand at the edge of the jump door, at 1000ft (about 100 storeies) high for the longest! (about 1 min) If u imagine my situation, you will think its damn scary, but I didn't cos I kept reminding myself there is nothing to be fearful of actually (only a little when the plane tilts and I wonder if I might just lose balance and drop out. :D) and thus I took the time to enjoy a view from so high, that it can't be consider bird-eye view. (cos the birds cant fly so high. Haha.)

I am at the heart of Singapore yet my sight could reach as far and as wide as all the edge of the island, esp when i the plane tilts to make a turn. I see duckweed-flooded marshes, surprisingly huge areas of forest, vehicles so small, people about 2 nanometre wide, and tall buildings looking like young shoots. best part is when the door faces the Sun and like gave me those feelings of "hope and a bright future ahead" kinda sensation. (I agree I am have wild imaginations over here.)

"5 seconds! Stand at the door!" knocked me out of my day dream and I placed both hands outside on the planes exterior, on the edge of the door. The wind so strong I feel the wind wanting to rip of my fingers, but I am still relaxed both in the mind and body, taking things to easily.

"Green on, GO!" and out I exit! "SNAP!" followed by "Ouch!" comes shortly. Yes, I "shattered" my back. (in Chinese call "shan dao yao") I never adopt the positive position cos I was too complacent and injuried my back, after a bit of violent jerking and uncontrolled twisting. I had thought, "Jialet! Must be having a lot of twist!" but luckily found none when I looked up. I tried to enjoy the view but the other part of my mind was thinking, "Die. Like that land with a chui back surely no fun..." so I was just simply trying to find the most soft spot to land. As expected, when I land my back was hurt again. Damn! I lied down stunned for like 5 seconds before I recover.

Now my back still hurts but I already went to see a sinseh. Skipped ndp rehearsal today (yeah!) but I dunno if I will be ready for National Day, if not all the time I spent rehearsing and my sat burned will be a pity. Please pray for my back to recover by then, which is er... 4 days time?

A picosecond after I exit.

A nanosecond after we exit. Back "shattered" liao by now.

Up in the sky...

Bottom view of a "decelerated shit droppings" from the sky

Now you can't denial that its a mechanical bird dropping droppings right? ;D

P.S. I have link up a very detailed website on staticline airborne jump. Visit it if you are interested.

Hitting the Big 20...

2006-08-05T13:27:00.000+07:00

I was extremely touched yesterday afternoon after I came back from my parachute jump. I was about to unlock my cupboard, there is this "stack of paper" thing hanging on my door hook. This is what the first piece read,

"to the once-upon-a-time Babyflame,
then the overly-AOE-enthusiastic Shenroll (Bankai!)
but always thewe-must-be-objective-and-sane,
the ba kwa selling, the greed level 16 greens at level 60,
the one and only Tan Wei Lun..."

It must be Yi Fong!, that's my immediate reaction and afterwhich, all that was happening was that I keep smiling to myself as I read on the handmade-one-and-only-WoW-birthday-scrape-card, like a silly little boy. Of course being euphoric, I did "something" to express my gratitude. Although I was caught by Koky and "Guai Lan" while doing "something" at the balcony and made them bewildered by my action, I feel really great to do "something". Haha. It’s in my wildest imagination to receive the gift and to

“the one who used to be jhorael,
now known as avalynne, but forever will be yif”

Thanks for your everything you’ve done for us (det 3) and your concerns despite all the shit that happened. You are great. :p

How did my birthday cards not slide down?!?!

The pendent is from my mei mei, Blue card in the mid from my KTV xinmin gang (read Gathering for the July Babies) n the colourful ones is from yif!

No extra hands to take photo with them. Haha.

Gathering for the July Babies!

2006-08-02T19:22:00.000+07:00

Went to Partyworld last Sunday with those crazy xinmin boys and girls and the ndp hunks (Man Xin, Dau Gou, Jeremy). I planned well ahead so that I can get everyone but still left out some of my poor friends. So sorry! Esp to Su Fang. I was really very upset initially but I guess I would just make it up one way or another ba. :(

Got a really big TV in the VIP room and chu zhen was so disappointed in my atrocious singing after anticipating to sing with me at ktv for the first time. Its not like I wanna turn her off but I need to get some training on my part. Haha. Did the usual crazy stuff with dau but it didn’t go as wild as it used to be. Maybe cos I am trying to tame the “unrestrained monkey” in me. Cannot be acting as “kiddish” as last time le ba.

The sweetest part of the whole thing is the july babies (veena, belle n myself) was bestow with a mini surprise celebration! Ah Hui and Dau lied about going toilet but instead they ran to Swensen’s, which is across the road, to purchase a choc ice cream cake. I was pondering “where in the world have they gone to” and the next minute, the 2 dumbass appear with a cake with 2 big candles on it. It’s the first time I receive a surprise a surprise birthday celebration! Thanks buddies!

Went crystal jade for dinner and I threw a small treat (xiao long bao) to everyone cos of the birthday surprise. Best part was after dinner when it left me, man xin, rong hui, yishen and dau siang. Being in a good mood, I drag them to outside Nee Ann City (at the fountain) to take some kinky picks full of cocky ideas. When its time to play, I still let go ba. Haha. Come to think of it, I never take many photos with my xinmin buddies so it’s quite meaningful lord. Woo!

Gorgeous me. Woo!

Me and the great singer, Guan. Woo!

Me and the hu li mei, Nette. Woo!

The 3 July babies, Me Belle Nana. Woo!

Learning the chopstick dance, Belle Zhen Jie. Woo!

Tortured. Woo!

And the pee. Woooo...... 0.0"

The Truth of Life

2006-07-30T10:52:00.000+07:00

I was reading a very meaningful post on a friend's, Cassandra blog and would like to share with everyone, especially if you are facing a sudden setback in your life.

"On intentions and uncertainties. On knowing the uncertainties, and choosing to ignore it.There is the knowledge that no matter how intent you are on marrying someone, there always lurks the uncertainty. Uncertainty that he may not be the right partner, that he may fall for someone else, that you may fall for someone else, that accidents may happen and you may lose each other, that parents may disapprove, that you might get sick of each other, that future is unknown and anything can happen.

That “intent” does not relate to just marriage alone. It relates to anything. An intention to do/achieve anything! Maybe that bachelors degree that everyone wants. Maybe you might get side tracked and get your education informally through road trips and guilt trips and such instead. Maybe you might decide that acting is your talent and your talent gets discovered and you get instant fame and you don’t need a bloody degree anymore! Maybe some rich old man falls for nubile young you and he dies leaving you an inheritance that will keep you more than satisfied for the rest of your live! Maybe you discover your sexuality and spend your life fucking as a living.

All I’m saying is that, no matter how intent and focused we are on achieving something, there is always the possibility of the unknown. Some people choose to put the unknown aside and just concentrate on their intent. It does not mean that they do not know about the unknown, it just means that they choose to ignore it.

It’s like, running really fast, aware of the risk of falling down and injuring yourself, but you still continue running because that it what you want to do. That is a short term metaphor. Long term wise, think of it this way: We are all going to die, the uncertainty lies in whether we die sooner, or we die later. But do we not all strive to make a better life for ourselves despite knowing the fact that we may die any day?"

I gave a comment on her blog like this:

"Hi Cassandra. I am Wei Lun from xinmin 4E1, Tan Wei Lun. Maybe you don't even remember mw ba but I happen to browse through Sin Guan's blog and visited your blog.

I just wanna let you know that I love this post cos it teaches us not to just blindly pursue a specific goal in life and to take a step back once a while to discover other beautiful things in life, cos what to are working towards so hard for might just disappear overnight. It’s a post with very deep meaning cos if you realise, like what u mentioned, this applies to every single thing in your daily lives and routine. Learn not to be overly persistent and grab onto anything too tightly cos nothing last forever, even diamonds can be destroyed.

With knowledge that your intent is always accompanied by uncertainty, we will have better mental preparation and able to ease the pain when any mishappenings struck us without warning. It enables us to recover from any setbacks because this is the truth of life and nobody escapes from this fact.

The important question after you know this fact is, how would you lead your life? How would you prepare to face any of life's uncertainty?" I personally do think through questions like this about life and how I will face them. It helps me to walk a fulfilling life and enjoy the real freedom, freedom to the mind. I am learning to be more forgiving, avoid arguments, love the environments, to appreciate every instance in life and most importantly plan for my future while not forgetting the Great Uncertainty.

A Passing Storm

2006-07-29T22:53:00.000+07:00

My very first blog entry.

Actually I have always think that writing a blog is a very good way to express what you believe, think and feel which others usually don’t get to know or which you don’t fell comfortable talking about, but I had been lazy. Its only until I gotten rather upset with the unsettling incidents that happen in army that gave me the final push to start a blog.

My detachment (something like a small platoon, which means these people is the closest ones I work with) had been facing a lot of internal disputes, and it was really bad that my det sergeant (DS), was thinking whether ti dissolve the det. Especially saddening was when I looked through our past photos (at Brunei and when we are still trainee) and remembered the extremely tough and challenging periods we went through, forging our brotherhood. Before we did a good trash out (except for Seng Da and Alvin Tan, thanks to Alvin’s hubris) on Thursday, we never get through a day peacefully. I was listening to the so-call det “theme song” just a day or 2 before Thursday, You’re Beautiful, in the bunk and nearly tear cause the disharmony in the bunk is really jialet. Shung Wai kept ignoring me, Guo Yong complaining to me every other night about how hated he think he was, Alvin Tan and Seng Da quarreling, the din created every now and then which made us feel so disturbed and lose our sense of belonging.

But fortunately on Thursday after we do a trash out and Yi Fong touched us with his side of story about how he felt about the det now, things have finally see the light for a better future. (must give credit to Den for acting as a neutral party. J) With the tension eased, I can only bet with my last dollar that det 3 will be smooth sailing and Alvin and Ah Da will resolve their jiang ju soon. Glad to have my brothers back. (Not the qi yue brothers of course. Haha.

Tough time don't last, tough men do!

~~~My Universe~~~